May the Lamb that was slain receive the reward of His suffering

That is a quote I heard today from some early Moravian missionaries.

*sigh* oh the weight and GLORY of God in Jesus Christ my Lord.

More and more and more it seems everyday I'm realizing just how much I need my eyes opened by Christ. How much more there is of Him and how much everything is for, about, pointing to Him. I was reminded today in a sermon I watched... of the absolute power and sigularity of just the straight-forward GOSPEL of Jesus Christ... we have NOTHING GOOD in us. Yes, we were created for good but WE messed up and even our good works are tainted with pride. D a r k n e s s ... but O a marvelous Light! The WORD of GOD, His FIRST and ONLY Begotton!! CARRIED ALL OUR: disobedience, lust, fornication, pride, judgementalism, gossiping tongue, murdering hands, apathetic heart = S I N, carried it on His human... human body as our just desserts, the horrible wrath of PERFECT ETERNAL YHWH was poured out on Him. He. DIED.

but now He's alive!!!

So that me: prideful, gossiper, blasphemer, judgmental, hateful apathetic me... can be lavished..... do you know what that word means?


lav·ish   /ˈlævɪʃ/

–adjective

1. expended, bestowed, or occurring in profusion: lavish spending.

2. using or giving in great amounts; prodigal (often fol. by of ): lavish of his time; lavish of affection.

–verb (used with object)

3. to expend or give in great amounts or without limit: to lavish gifts on a person.
 
This love and grace and M E R C Y and power.... unspeakable. Can be LAVISHED on ME!!!??
 
O  N  L  Y.... only only only... if:
 
1. I REPENT of my sin.... not only confess (which needs to happen to repent anyway) but repent of them... repent or metanoeō in the Greek means to change ones mind. Telling God you DONT WANT TO DO IT ANYMORE and seek to NOT do it anymore

2. BELIEVE!!! Yes!! Its that good of news!!! the power of JESUS is THAT poweful! He can make you COMPLETELY PERFECT before God! He can! He can! and He did!!! 2,000 years ago!

I read a very familiar story the other day.. but what really stood out to me in this reading was just how much of a gospel story it was... and... man..... just suprised and crushed and so so deeply moved.... by the GRACE

John 8:1-11 (English Standard Version)


1 but Jesus went to the Mount of Olives. 2 Early in the morning he came again to the temple. All the people came to him, and he sat down and taught them. 3 The scribes and the Pharisees brought a woman who had been caught in adultery, and placing her in the midst 4 they said to him, "Teacher, this woman has been caught in the act of adultery. 5 Now in the Law Moses commanded us to stone such women. So what do you say?" 6 This they said to test him,that they might have some charge to bring against him. Jesus bent down and wrote with his finger on the ground. 7 And as they continued to ask him, he stood up and said to them, "Let him who is without sin among you be the first to throw a stone at her." 8 And once more he bent down and wrote on the ground. 9 But when they heard it, they went away one by one, beginning with the older ones, and Jesus was left alone with the woman standing before him. 10 Jesus stood up and said to her, "Woman, where are they? Has no one condemned you?" 11 She said, "No one, Lord." And Jesus said, "Neither do I condemn you; go, and from now on sin no more."

I'm an auntie :)... (sort of)

Just visited 2 of my best friends in the world and their new baby girl, Nakoda Grace

She was absolutely beautiful

I'm still in shock somewhat to have seen my friends go from dating, to marriage to parenthood the past few years. I kept asking them if it had sunken in yet and they non-chalauntly would say, "Not really" but never-the-less you can tell they've already changed. Ready or not, God has already created a whole new depth of love in their souls for this precious baby girl.

I got a little glimpse of it from holding her for so long (for about an hour... YES!!) Though I had just met this little person, I already sensed an affection and protective feeling for her. This little girl was a perfect mixture of two people I care about so very deeply. Such a strange new sensation!

I realized coming back here, children are really a true and tangible sign of hope. Hope that if this kind of love and life can exist for someone who hasnt really done anything yet to deserve that love, and we are simple incomplete people, just IMAGINE the grace and love God has for us... inspiring

Time time: on the way home

11:39

Tired, sore, stinky

Realizing I think/say way too much

Seeking further, deeper, more real dependance on God

I care a lot about what other people think of me, but I also believe God can change that

Sometimes I wonder what truly loving people looks like

I am so unbelievably grateful that I am not God and that God doesnt want or expect me to be Him

Hey, why am I talking so much about myself?

Wyoming and Colorado are BEAUTIFUL

The rock formations in Wyoming reminded me of the movie Cars :)

I was taking a nap and woke up just in time to go under a small tunnel that was just like the movie

Chris bought me Toy Story 3... :) :)

I really enjoyed doing devotionals with the band, tonight's one God really blessed, we read James 4

We just changed it to Jon Foremans Baptize My Mind, whenever I hear this song I really can relate to what hes singing about

I'm glad God is sovereign and that His Will will be done

I need to be more grateful for this moment... beautiful music, beautiful surroundings, beautiful time of night, beautiful people, surrounded by a Beautiful God...

Holly bought a little elf stuffed toy that has a guitar and sings a song... she bought it because he was dressed just like Adam :) Little collectable things are cool

"Oh my Lord, to suffer like You do. It would be a lie to run away"

In the front seat there's an extension chord that drops down and hangs about at seat level. It swings like a pendullum. The laws of physics at work... When God sets something in place, it always continues until He says for it do something different

"Deep in your eyes there is a river"

Adam woke up... He looked a lot like one of my good friends from high school because of the low light... it freaked me out... I didn't know who it was

I LOVE THE SONG EQUALLY SKILLED!!!

God is really breaking my leg... (I should understand this)

I'm starting to really care deeply for all the people in this RV... more than before

I just read this all to Holly... maybe I should get a Tumblr

Praying for Chris and Rob... their tummys hurt :(

I'm pretty excited to read this months from now... I hope it brings me right back

...Best Western...

*hehe* I love watching the windsheild wipers.. they look like they're dancing

Holly's socks remind me of candy canes

I worry too much

"We are not one thing, we're joined here together. My ocean and me"

I hope I have an "ocean" someday

Holly keeps accidentally turning the music off

I think I should probably stop doing this now

12:17

Tour: Iowa, Nebraska and Colorado

Man, not alot but a whole lot has happened the past few days. Fell asleep in Wisconson and woke up in Iowa one morning... Oh, what was really great was that we sleep in a Walmart parking lot, which is great for 2 reasons: 1, I have a growing love for Walmart and 2, "I slept in parking lots, I don't mind, I don't mind". Stopped in at this church and talked to their pastor... he was nice. It was Clarks friend Ellen (who's really nice) home church. After that we had a great dinner and Ellen's parents house. (She skyped, it was cute). A wall in her room was a chalkboard, we all signed it :). The next day we were in Nebraska. We had devotionals with the whole band, discussed alot of different things, I love the body of Christ. There was a maybe contact at a fairly big church there, but we were having to wait too long to hear back from them so we decided to just have a nice lunch altogether. Though we were wondering if it was the right choice, we went to Cheesecake Factory. It was delicious (of course). At lunch Clark got a callback from the pastor. Because we stopped where we did we were still really close to the town he was in. God is SO faithful! The meeting was really great, he was a neat, passionate guy and tweeted that he really liked us. I'm typing all of this in a laundramat in Aurora Colorado. A few of us are kinda sick. Say a prayer.

God thank you for your faithfulness and steadfastness, especially when things seem to be going so fast. Keep us pure, keep us safe, keep us near your heart, use us.

 

Adam bought a tinkerbell guitar

Tour: WisCANson into MinnesOOta

Driving now on the Laura Ingles Wilder history highway. The boys are talking about what they remember from the books (which is alot more than I can remember.) The 2 shows in Wisconsin were really great, the people were so nice. They played a really sweet looking bigger venue the other night and last night played this little church about a half hour away. Such sweet people. I keep forgetting I'm in another state. Me and Holly talked about God this morning... I always want to freeze time and live in those moments forever.

We skyped Kindra!!! She watched like the entire show!

Went to a popular stop called "Culvers" its like Dairy Queen but.. custard

Beautiful little church

They had a shofar so we felt like we needed to blow it before the show :)

Hanging with Hollys friend Ben

Tour: Fantasitc Mr. Party

Hello!!!

Currently I'm sitting at Sea-Tac watching two cute laughing little kids and their dad... amazed at the kindness of God through complete strangers (as this is the first time I've flown alone, I've had a couple times already where I didnt know quite what I was doing and a few kind strangers directed me) and His wonderful family!

*sigh* Sometimes I really miss Seattle. Being surrounded by peers brings with it some sort of great excitement for some reason... not to mentioned when thoes peers are some of your favorite people in the world :)

Now, I will share you pictures of Emily and Jon's Fantastic Mr. Fox themed party. (including mashed potatoes, cider and SOCK PUPPETS :)

Music yes?

If God wills, 25 hours from now I'll be in Seattle hanging out with some AMAZING people for the night, then in the morning off to Wisconson to ride in a big RV with 6 other AMAZING people on a two and a half week road trip from WI, to CO and back to WA.

God You are incredible. May only You be glorified in all the goings on of this trip.

Just wanted to give a little update on my musical taste. Happened along a new band (not really new but new to me). And they might just become one of my favoirtes. They're called The Welcome Wagon. Folksy, Sufjan-style hymns.... mmm...mmm...good!

A Yearning in my Heart

Hello

Havent written here in a while. All the times I've wanted to I've been prevented or felt that whatever God was teaching me at the time didn't need to be written but lived out.

But this really needs to be read by more than just me

There have been so many different twists and turns in direction and so new revelation. I've had ups and downs, things staying the same, things radically changing. God is so much more real and sovereign than I've ever perceived before though He is more real and sovereign than I can even imagine now.

As for whats next for me, I've always wanted to serve the poorest of the poor. Whether that be a prideful desire to make myself look holy or it be placed on my heart from God, its been there.

When I hear stories like the one I'm going to share here, something rings so true in my spirit it feels like I'm catching the very heartbeat of God... A friend of mine from college, Luke Davis right after graduating spring of 09' premed went to work with (what I believe to be) a non-profit organization in the Dominican Republic. While he was there an earthquake devestated the neighboring country Haiti so he moved nearer to the boarder to help these desparate people. He has since came back home and this summer went back over, all the while keeping a blog which he periodically updates. From time to time I go back and read his blog to see how he's doing, this entry really rang true to alot of what God cares most about.

You can read his story here.

God bless

Why didn't I think of that???

To anyone who actually still follows this...

Hi :)

Big things have come and gone, God is still in control, big and good. I'm still in Quincy at the moment and trying to let God lead me into whatever He has next. First thing on the list of important life things for me to do right now, get my website running and presentable and get my name out there. Found an art website (which I am VERY suprised I didnt inspect as much as I could have earlier) called Behance which is seeming to be AMAZING. Just found this set of works on there and exclaimed...

















Heres a link to the peices on Behance: http://www.behance.net/gallery/See-_-Saw/56191