Pause for Contemplation or Word Vomit: Your Choice

Been thinking about many different things just recently....

All the personal emotional struggles I've had this year
All the struggles/wonderful things my family has gone through recently
My future
How I've grown
Other peoples ideas and growth through their lives
How fatal and impactful and real pain is not only in individual lives but in the world as a whole
How instinctively prone to harming ourselves and other we really are
How I am the MOST prone to that
How so far away and silent God seems at times
How much closer God is to me than my very flesh at times
Just starting to scratch the outer surface of how enormous Grace is
How there is no hope... at all in politics, money and especially people
How its so true that there is a great Evil at work in the world today
Figuring out just much I am not suppose to be secure in anything earthly and just scratching the surface of how fully and utterly I NEED to be secure in the promises of the Almighty
How truly I am needing/experiencing discipline
Realizing the width and the breadth of Gods love so much the point that it hurts
Realizing deeper than I ever have before my own depravity
Realizing deeper than I ever have before God's sufficiency
Being terrified and worried about the future
Being excited and at peace about the future
Starting to see and understand how much I love/have received love from the very important people in my life
Seeing that all of that love is really God
(One of my favorites) Seeing that one big thing God is is a Storyteller
Seeing the influence of art not only on my life but on everyones (in all its forms)
Seeing just how deep of a need there is in places like Africa
Really loving my friends and family
Realizing how truly I have not figured it out at all
Being surprisingly contented there, knowing that I know the One who does

Discovering I might have ADHD...... that ones a joke :)